Have you ever felt ambivalent?
“Hmm, it’s sunny, I’d enjoy a walk in the park,” but at the same time, “It’s sunny, the park will be crowded, don’t really wanna mix with people now.”
Have you ever worn different hats?
Like when you decide not to have a beer with colleagues at lunch because you’re wearing the “working hat,” but then have a few too many with your friends because you’re wearing the “party hat.” That’s pretty reasonable, right?
Now imagine…
You’re thinking, “Hmm, it’s sunny, I’d enjoy a walk in the park.” Then a voice inside says, “It’s sunny, the park will be crowded, don’t really wanna mix with people now.” Another voice chimes in, “Well, how about we go to the pub instead?” And then another cuts in with, “OMG, you always want to go to the pub—what is wrong with you?!” So, you end up having a lengthy conversation, negotiating: maybe the pub in the park, but only if it’s not too busy, and no alcoholic drinks this time.
The “voices” can engage in conversations, each with their own opinions, perspectives, and even knowledge, memories, and life experiences that are separate from your own.
For years, we thought this was just ambivalence or “wearing different hats”—the normal inner dialogues everyone has. But we’ve been informed by those in the know that we’re actually, well, kinda crazy. (Oh my, what a terrible word!) But it’s the good kind of crazy—the kind that means we’re friendly, warm, creative, and, well… unapologetically human in our own unique way!
Now, if you want to understand the psychology, neurology, and science behind plurality—along with possible healing options and therapies—I’ll have to direct you to https://neurodivergent.uk. That site is run by our more functional and nerdier “alters”, though we prefer to call them Fam Members.
This site, however, is about us—the so-called “trauma holders,” the “exiles,” the “survivors.” And to echo Samuel Beckett: “When you’re in the shit up to your neck, there’s nothing left to do but sing.”
Here, you’ll find our “songs.”
Plurality is complicated—it’s messy and unfathomable. It is so deeply personal that each of us in the Fam experiences it differently. How it starts, how it feels, and how it shapes us isn’t something we can summarize in a neat little paragraph—it’s something you’ll come to understand as you explore this site. Think of it as a journey, one we’re inviting you to take with us.
But what we can share right now is how creativity became our anchor. Writing, poetry, and art—these are the ways we’ve made sense of the chaos inside. They’re the bridges between our inner world and the outer one.
It legitimizes everything about us—our feelings, perspectives, interactions, and all that is dark, deep, hidden, and mysterious.
No one can say “snap out of it,” “get a grip,” or “happiness is a state of mind,” or any of the other ableist, callous comments we always get.
IT’S ART! Deal with it. You don’t have to like it—but you can’t dismiss it.
For many of us, we’ve been told that healing isn’t an option. We’ve heard it all before: “You just have to live with it.” It’s about enduring cycles of abysmal desperation, with only occasional glimpses of a bearable life.
So be it! We live with it, grinding on, and no matter what—we will not be defeated. Life is Kintsugi: broken but repaired with gold. And our Indomitability? That’s the gold—making our pieces more beautiful and our Self and Selves priceless.
And this is what you’ll find on our site. The more our voices are heard—the more we can sign our individual names at the bottom of each page—the stronger we become.
Teo, one of the Children’s Hosts, is only 7 years old, but they always say, “I don’t need to be happy; I just need to be with my Fam.”
Don’t get me wrong—it’s not “ok not to be ok.” That’s just something ableist and emotionally privileged people say to ignore others’ struggles.
But it is ok not to be ok when that leads to self-expression, mutual understanding, and inner communication. It’s ok when it strengthens the bonds within the Fam and connects us with the Universe.
So, we invite you to explore our site. Bookmark it. Use the Contact Us page or comments section to share your own experiences. Whether you’re a struggling or thriving survivor, an ally, or someone curious about plurality, we hope this site becomes a place of comfort and solace for you—just as it is for us.
And if you want to share your own experience in a post, let us know! We’ll make sure you get the credit you deserve for your determination to survive—and your courage to share.
Healing through Art
We have literally hundreds of Fam Members, but a few are the voices of those who don’t have one. Here are the leaders
